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You're Online, I Can See You....

Posted: 16-04-06

I love technology. I always have. If it has wire-like protrusions and the potential for electric shock, I'm all over it. HiFi's, gadgets and now the Internet.

Now with reference to the latter and much like you I'd wager, I of course dislike email spam. Any unsolicited email in fact. But with the recent bout of mails sent from those lets-meet-up websites, you know the ones: "Where Are You Now", "Friends Reunited" and "Linked In" - I'm left a bit bewildered you see.

The email received via these sites, initiated doubtlessly by well-meaning acquaintances, is not spam as such, but is unwanted. Please don't misunderstand me, I don't wish in any way to come across as unthankful or mean. Of course it's great to be able to so easily keep in touch with old friends, but in the past, much of the joy of receiving contact from long lost acquaintances, was the difficulty you knew had to be overcome to do so: These people really wanted to get in touch with you. They spoke to your Dad's, best friends-dog's masters, nephew to get your address, hand wrote reams in the form of an essay and visited the Post Office to get half a hundred weight of stamps to send the letter and photo of Auntie Mable to the other side of the world.

Now all they need to do is add an email address and a name to an Internet database and instantaneously be able to email old friends from school who've not been seen or heard of in ten years. Maybe ten years simply isn't long enough to be truly surprised to hear from someone on the other side of the world?

Then there's MSN and Skype. Looking at them in a different way, you discover that these little bits of software have re-shaped the way you perceive your friends and family.

How strange.

When I was a kid it was a case of pot luck - I'd call my best friend on the phone at about five in the evening and ask Mrs Simpson if David was home and if he was coming out to play after tea. Now I can load up Skype and see in plain view that there are a handful of people, very good friends, people I grew up with or met overseas, ready for a chat online there and then. I can almost see them sat there in front of their computer. However, very possibly I just might not feel like calling them at all. Which is fine - right? Even though I *know* I haven't spoken to them for months and that very possibly they'd like me to call them.

As a result there's a niggling feeling that because they're online, they see I'm online, that I'm not calling them, that they secretly think I'm rude for not calling, knowing as they do, that I know, they're online. It's a stalemate - who calls first? The longer you leave it just amplifies the paranoia.

Or is this just me!?